1 Kings 21:1-16
Ahab’s Response to God’s Rebuke

In last week’s passage, King Ahab was confronted by a son of the prophets; he left that meeting vexed and sullen. In this week’s passage, we discover that his response did not change over the days and weeks that followed. After Dave read and explained Queen Jezebel’s evil plan to frame and murder the owner of the vineyard Ahab coveted, he devoted the rest of his sermon to a “meeting” with us on a difficult topic: the curse that we all bear because of sin. The evil we see in Jezebel and Ahab came into the world at the very beginning, when Adam and Eve sinned. The Bible makes it clear that every human being since Adam and Eve has sinned too. We all deserve the curse God declared on our first ancestors. Part of the curse on Eve and all women is that we desire to usurp the place of men, to overturn the authority structure ordained by God. The curse on Adam and his male descendants, the hard toil required to make a living, was the consequence of Adam disregarding God to please his wife. King Ahab is a prime example of a weak man, and Jezebel is a prototype of a wife who takes over.

How will we respond to this confrontational meeting about the power struggle between men and women that dates to the very beginning of human history? Let’s not be vexed and sullen, unwilling to face the challenge. Let’s not claim innocence either: “My husband (or wife) and I are just fine! We really don’t have a problem in this area.” Dave claimed, with biblical backing, that every husband struggles with ceding leadership to his wife and that every wife struggles with the temptation to snatch it. As I considered how wives might pray about this important topic, I asked my husband, John, to suggest how men might pray.

For wives (Carol): Ask the Holy Spirit to show you specific examples of times you have disrespected your husband’s leadership role and taken control (or tried to take, or desired to take, control). Questions to ask yourself include: Do I contradict or correct him on things that don’t really matter just to demonstrate my superiority? Do I manipulate him with displays of emotion? When he steps up and disciplines the kids or makes a tough decision, do I support him or second-guess him? Have I learned to control my tongue but remain a constant critic in my head?

For husbands (John): Men, how easy it is for us to brood in silence when we should lead! Perhaps today’s version of 1 Kings 21:4 would be, “Ahab retreated to his man cave and buried himself in NFL playoffs, allowing Jezebel to come up with her evil plan.” Ask yourself, “What is keeping me from actually leading rather than taking the easiest, least painful path, abdicating the leadership role to which God calls me?” Do we men view leading as a skill that we can develop and improve through practice and discipline? Are we willing to take the time and effort to listen to our wives, love our wives, accept counsel from them, and at the same time provide godly leadership?

As we continue to process Sunday’s meeting, may we all be driven to God’s presence to receive the healthy conviction of the Holy Spirit, respond with repentance, and beseech the Lord for help.

Dave noted that he has preached on the roles of husbands and wives based on 1 Peter 3:1-7. He actually preached two sermons on that topic in the spring of 2022. You can find the first one here and the second one here.

Calvary Family

Lift up the Men’s Breakfast this Saturday morning, praying for good fellowship and a warm welcome extended to guests. Perhaps conversations around the tables will include the topic of godly leadership in marriage and families!

Many are praying for the firefighters battling the fires in LA County. Calvary’s Robert Thompson and his crew were sent to the Palisades in the early days of that fire, but they had to return early because of damage to their rig. Bethany Thompson told me that a Fullerton fire crew is still working the Palisades fire. She asks us to pray for safety and endurance for the firefighters doing incredibly difficult and exhausting work. She also reminds us to pray for their families, holding down the fort without them, sometimes for weeks at a time.

In Christ,
Carol Gilbert

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